Friday, December 19, 2014

Market Deals!

Tomorrow is the last day I can sell my wares before Christmas.  So, I'm going to make the most of it by having a lot of new Market Deals!

Large Seasonal/Holiday/Winter Themed/(oh, let me just say it!) Christmas cards will be $10 instead of the regular package for $15!

Smaller packages of Christmas cards, regularly $10, will be $7 or two for $15!

Plus, there are a lot of other goodies to make your Christmas shopping fun and easy!

I hope to see you there, everybody!

Thursday, December 18, 2014

A Day of Communication and Healing Part II

For a few hours yesterday afternoon, I was completely alone with my thoughts and feelings.  I listened to my favourite songs, worked a little, and shed a few tears.

 As I said in another post, this holiday season has been harder on me than expected.  I feel pretty much as I did five years ago when I had to deal with Rob's death.  I cry at songs that remind me of Rob and Mom or at the things I see that I would have bought for them.

I'm not a Scrooge, but 75% of me hates Christmas - especially this one!  I'm not only grieving for Rob and Mom, but for a simpler past, for myself (where is that spunky kid who believed that everything would turn out ok no matter what?) and for a friendship I've either lost or I'm losing.

When depression has me in its dark, vice-like grip, I listen to Ed Sheeran's Drunk and think to myself, Yeah., I want to get drunk!  I want to get WASTED!  I want to numb the pain a little.  Unfortunately/fortunately, it never happens, I never get "wasted".  After one or two drinks I get very sleepy and have to stop or go to bed.

Lately, when I need to cheer myself up, I listen to Elton John's I'm Still Standing or Queen's Don't Stop Me Now!  Both are uplifting and empowering songs, and they make me smile.

Sometimes when songs only soothe my tattered nerves, I hang out with my friends.  We talk about a wide variety of things, laugh a lot, and pat my cats excessively.

It is during these times that I wonder if that spunky, optimistic kid still living within me.  Perhaps I could coax her out with a peppermint mocha frappuccino ....

Wednesday, December 17, 2014

A Day of Communication and Healing

Like a lot of mornings, I suddenly jerked awake and mentally scolded myself for not emailing/texting/calling people I knew I should be contacting.

I got through maybe 75% of the people on my mental list: friends, family, my financial advisor, dentist, doctor.  I'll do the other 25% tomorrow ....

The cards I'd received in the post yesterday were all folded, labeled, and packaged up today.  I have to be ready for the Saturday Christmas rush at the market!

For a few hours in the late afternoon, I was completely alone with my thoughts and feelings ....

To be continued at a later time ....

Tuesday, December 16, 2014

Cat Painting Completed

Yay, I'm finished the cat painting!

This painting was interesting for two reasons:  1) I found a picture of this cat on Instagram and liked it (and the composition) so much that I had to capture it onto canvas.  And, 2) I painted the cat backwards, from tail to head.  I did this because I thought it might be easier to block it out on the canvas and make sure that the whole body would fit.

I was going to say more, but I took a Percocet to ease my muscle pains and now I'm feeling nauseous.

Bloody hell.

Monday, December 15, 2014


I'm determined to finish the painting of the fluffy cat tonight.

I'll talk to you tomorrow ....

Sunday, December 14, 2014

Christmas is TERRIFYING!

The morning was work, work, work for me.  I did the payroll and uploaded it to my bookkeeper.  I edited some card designs and ordered more merchandise.  (Saturday is the last chance for me to sell my Christmas stock.)  And, I had my laundry and floors washed.  Plus, I booked a trip with Wheel Trans to go visit my Aunt Joyce on Sunday.

In the evening, Motria and Laura came over for dinner.  We ate macaroni and cheese and salad; drank white wine; and watched funny/cute animals on YouTube.  All in all, it was a fun evening. I hadn't seen either Motria or Laura in ages! 

I always want to take pictures whenever they come over.  Motria and Laura weren't thrilled about having their pictures taken this time, though, but they came around when it was decided that we should fake being scared - scared of Christmas!

With Christmas being only eleven days away and so much still to do, it is a scary thought ....

Saturday, December 13, 2014

Beautiful December Day

I wore my brightest, most cheerful clothes today.  The clothes didn't exactly match mood.  I was so tired that I kept dozing off at the market.  However, I had so many customers that I didn't get very much rest - which definitely is not a complaint!  People seemed jovial and filled with the holiday spirit.  I kind of flirted with one customer because he was hot and I liked his German accent.

The weather mirrored my clothes: warm, bright, and beautiful.

I, on the other hand, remain so tired.

Hopefully, my cats and my over-active mind will behave themselves tonight ....

Friday, December 12, 2014

Technical Difficulties AGAIN!

Sorry, but I'm facing technical difficulties AGAIN!  I need to delete some files before my computer decides to go on strike and shuts down completely.

Maybe I should offer it more coffee breaks ....

Thursday, December 11, 2014

One of Those Days

It's been one of those days.

The falling snow made me groan inwardly and feel sad.

I laughed out loud when Hershey sat on the clothes I had planned on wearing and refused to move off of them.

I feel happy and content as I paint now.  Hopefully, I'll finish it tonight.

Nothing more than that happened today.

Wednesday, December 10, 2014

Cat Painting and Shrooms

I'm almost finished the painting of the fluffy cat. That's good! Actually, the whole day has been very good and positive. I mean, sure, I woke up feeling extremely depressed like I've been doing for over a month, but talking to my counsellor and getting it all out made me feel better.

I think what really made me happy, though, was the reaction of my counsellor to my announcement was that I wanted to try doing mushrooms during the Christmas holidays. I explained to her that I had heard shrooms were very helpful in very helpful in dealing with grief. Much to my amazement, she was very cool and supportive about my idea. I think I would have felt very different and disappointed in my counsellor if she had reacted negatively.

In previous posts I've said how I always try to expose myself to the very core, whether in my art or blog. And recently I've been slacking off at least with my blog, either because of time restrictions or because the emotions are too tangled for me to relay here. However, in the future I will try to be more open about what's going on in my head.

Right now, though, I am going to try to finish my cat painting.

Tuesday, December 9, 2014

Painting is on My Mind

I have a lot of things on my mind ... some aren't great ... so, I'm dealing with it all by painting.

Painting soothes my ravaged soul.

Monday, December 8, 2014

Presents and Continued Painting

By now, if you're familiar with my posts, you know that I'm a worrier.  Last night, I kept jerking awake thinking Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh!  Christmas is coming, Christmas is coming!  I don't have very many more days to buy presents and wrap them!

So, after I mailed a package at the post office in Shoppers Drug Mart I went Christmas shopping.  When I got home, I wrapped the presents all up.

I bought a present for myself, too - this magazine with Johnny Depp on the cover!

I think that this brilliant find and my relief at getting 95% of my Christmas shopping completed will allow me to sleep like a baby tonight.

Right now, however, I'm going to continue work on my newest painting ....

Sunday, December 7, 2014

Flowers and a Pain in the Neck

"Vibrant Flowers on a Gloomy Day"
Apart from putting this painting up on Etsy, I did a lot of things today!  I'd tell you about them all, too, but my neck is KILLING me!

Oh, my kingdom for a Percocet!

Saturday, December 6, 2014

Tired but Happy Today

I'm tired but happy as I write this.

I had a good day at the market today.  Not only did I make over $100.00, but Sarah was my assistant during the morning shift.  I hadn't seen Sarah in over a month, so it was good to catch up with her!

And when I got home, I checked my email and saw that somebody had purchased one of my paintings on Etsy.

This makes me so happy!  Maybe one day, if I work hard enough, Etsy could be a bigger part of how I make my income.

And, speaking of work, although I'm very tired I need to work on the employees' schedule and upload a couple more pictures to Etsy before I go to bed.

Friday, December 5, 2014

Hard Work Pays Off

Hard work does pay off sometimes.  Last night, I posted more of my work onto the Etsy website.

Meowy Christmas!

Two Dogs in a Stroller

And, this morning I got an email saying that I had sold some of my cards.  I'm so happy!  Sure, it was only a set of two packages, but still it's something!

To reward myself, I enjoyed an osteopath treatment from Anita and had a 45 minute cat nap with my cats.

The boys  had their five minutes of pats from Anita and are still sleeping.

I, on the other hand, am back to painting my ass off again!